* KOP memoir
tHeKOPrAntS@2:35 AM
ok..here's something for a laugh..no offence though..juz some mail ppl sent to me..
>i don't know who did this, but she/he might get sued.. anyhow, who cares,
>have a laugh.
>>
>>
>>
>>Dear [name of a boy],
>>
>>It has come to my attention that you have been selected as a potential
>>student of ACS(I). We are indeed pleased to welcome you to our big family.
>>However, there are a few improvements that have to be made for you to be
>>qualified to be one of us.
>>
>>Firstly, your physical appearance needs alteration. According to our
>>school's tradition, our attire includes:
>>
>>1. spiked hair
>>2. pants worn on the hips
>>3. almost completely hidden socks
>>4. shirts not tucked in properly etc.
>>
>>Furthermore, you must have bushy eyebrows and tan skin to be eligible.
>>Thus,
>>we would appeal that you make this changes ASAP.
>>
>>Secondly, other than outward appearance, what goes on inside is crucial as
>>well. We adhere struictly to our 3 acts: Act Cool, Act Attitude and Act
>>Poser, stressing on poser-ism as the basis of our image.
>>
>>Act cool: All ACSI students are required to be adept in pretending to be
>>cool in the way bimbos will fall for the trick, even though it is
>>obviously
>>not the proper definition of "cool". We do not want our students to be
>>cool
>>but to ACT cool. This will include mannerisms like acting nonchalant and
>>pompous that will create the false impression that ACSI guys are indeed
>>very
>>desirable and good looking.
>>
>>Act attitude: Due to the fact that bimbos absolutely love attitudal guys,
>>we
>>emphasise strongly on pretending to have attitude in our boys. You will
>>hence have to act like a very bad person when you are in fact an insecure
>>and deprived person.
>>
>>Act poser: AS this is the trademark of our school, it will require no
>>further explanation.
>>
>>To adhere to our school's motto "The best is yet to be", we require you to
>>stop getting good results in school especially in the area of literature,
>>as
>>this opposes our motto. You will hence need to go out more with bimbos,
>>have
>>fun, screw around and be less concerned with your studies.
>>
>>Your Chinese grades need to be extremely poor and you will have to hate it
>>a
>>lot. In other words, you must forget all your roots and be a perfect
>>banana.
>>You are also required to be rich to avoid being ostracised and looked down
>>upon in our school. More emphasis will also be put on sports to create the
>>false impression that ACSI guys are all rounders.
>>
>>We look forward to your joining our huge ACS family and we certainly do
>>believe you have the potential, judging by your bimbo attracting qualities
>>prevalent in all our students. We believe that with more posing, despising
>>Chinese and acting, you can definitely be an outstanding representation of
>>ACSI.
>>
>>yours sincerely,
>>Ong Teck Chin
>>Principal
>>Anglo Chinese School (Independent)
Monday, November 10, 2003
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